Meh. That’s how I sum up my feelings about tonight’s final audition episode EVER of American Idol. Really, that’s the best I can do.
After an amazing first audition by Jessica Cabral, I was ready for a night full of talent and William Hung flashbacks. This girl came on and shot right to the top ten list for me. Her story is interesting but not sappy, she isn’t annoying, her parents aren’t annoying, she is attractive and her voice was warm like butter on a biscuit. The soft, Popeyes kind of biscuit that is real good with warm butter and honey. Yes, her voice was that good.
Then we sort of veered off course for a while. We had to spend time with Cody Ostrenga who did a belly dance for JLo which flowed into a montage of couples auditioning together (none of which were on tonight) and finally to Brian Dale Brown. His audition was far from the quality I’m looking for but then again, I guess I’m not getting paid to judge singers. Brian getting a golden ticket made me angry all over again about Mario Bonds. This guy did a Scooby Doo/Keith Urban impression (ridiculous) and sang fine. No…just no.
We had a girl in a poodle skirt with a dog named Tinkerbell who was devastated not to be put through, followed by a bunch more devastated people. What troubled me was that they were all so distraught about having nothing left. I mean, The Voice is still on right? Try that! Somewhere in all of this nonsense was a guy who wanted to be Mr. Kelly Clarkson. Not going there.
Anyway, then we had Melany Huber, Chynna Sherrod, Kayce Haynes and Usen Isong scattered amongst some quick gold ticket montages. These four all had great stories and were good performers but I’m feeling like they will be victims of Hollywood week for various reasons. I don’t want to talk about Lillian Blanton and her cowboy boots and her original song and the cooked up drama of JLo having to cast the final vote. Should have been no…and Harry, you aren’t the crazy one.
Towards the end we picked up Zach Persons, a blues singer/musician from Houston, Texas who had some House Party hair but the voice of an old soul and I loved it and him. Colette Lush, a spunky redhead who is apparently concerned about the extinction of redheads, was a perfect package of quirky and adorable with a timeless voice. Avalon Young followed with an almost exact opposite personality but an amazing voice and zero style. If Avalon makes it through, I will enjoy seeing her transformation into whatever Idol wants her to be as much as I will enjoy her singing.
Soon after they put through some alternative rock chick with green face paint, it was time for the final American Idol audition of our lives. I have to give it to the producers for choosing a guy that was nearly perfect. Manny Torres is a Worship Leader from Flushing, Michigan who also happens to be Puerto Rican like Jenny from the Block and carries with him the most endearing smile. We met his family, he played the guitar and sang really well and we loved him. The end.
A bit unceremonious but that’s kind of how it felt. I guess that’s over. Moving on.
I’ve compiled my list of 24 hopefuls that actually got good screen time but, as we all know, there will be surprises and new faces next week. I’m looking forward to meeting the hot guy in the gray beanie that they flashed a few times but that we never got to hear. Anyone know who that guy is?
See you next week in Hollywood.